|
|
 Most people approach new situations with joy, excitement, and anticipation. Benchmark Recovery Center took the female residents on an outing this week that was no different. Looking around the art studio, I observed carefree conversations, laughter, and merriment.
The excitement for me, however, was short-lived. Waiting beyond the conviviality was a blank canvas, fresh paint, clean brushes, and the picture we were to paint, ultimately, a new experience. Doubt, inability, and failure immediately clouded the scene. I knew that the picture in my mind’s eye would never be actualized. My ego exclaimed, “What an order! I can’t go through with it.’’
While my insecurity hid behind bravado, my mind was barraged with irrational thoughts: These women are artists. They paint all the time. Their paintings will probably rival those of Da Vinci or Picasso. They will laugh at my painting. They will taunt me. And on and on the craziness went until my gaze caught Courtney’s. With a glance, she was able to bring me back to the land of “normalcy” or at least to the present moment.
I shared some of those crazy thoughts, and after the laughter subsided, she quickly smashed my delusions one by one. She reminded me that it was okay to be nervous, that I’m not the only one who has never painted, that everyone was embracing a new experience, and that I’m not weird, inadequate, or dumb.
As with any productive tenth step, I was directed to take action. So I picked up my paintbrush, loaded it with red paint and tackled the vast area of whiteness. Two hours, numerous strokes, and many mistakes later, my masterpiece was complete. While it is highly doubtful my painting will adorn the walls of an art gallery any time soon, the point is that I was willing to grow.
“If you hear a voice within you say ‘you cannot paint,’ then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced.” Vincent Van Gogh
Vickie Bing is the Director of Alumni Services for Benchmark Recovery Center. She received her B.A. in English from the University of Texas at Arlington. Vickie is a former high school teacher. She is also an Air Force Veteran. You can read other posts at benchmarkcenter.com/blog.
 Jason Chane, Executive Director of the Benchmark Recovery’s Men’s Program, will be in London May 7-11 to listen and speak with professionals in the recovery community. His first stop will be at the Association of Intervention Specialists Annual Meeting of Interventionists. AIS members from around the world will gather to share ideas and news.
While abroad, Jason will also attend the UKESAD 10th Annual Symposium on Addiction Disorders. UKESAD was one of the first conferences created for professionals to learn more about how to help others attain and sustain a permanent life of sobriety.
Benchmark Recovery encourages residents, alumni and staff to share their experience, strength and hope. Learning from others within the recovery community is a valuable experience that allows us to share with one another both challenges and success.
We wish Jason a fun and safe trip while he his abroad! Making new connections and gaining useful knowledge to help improve upon our recovery programs for residents and alumni.
The Godfather Robe is a tradition that has been passed down through Benchmark Recovery Center Men’s communities since March 2010. It is a tradition that was started and maintained by residents. The distinction of “The Godfather” of the community, and its accompanying robe, is given to the resident who has fire for recovery, is a positive example for other residents, and who will embody a leadership role. The Godfather presides over weekly group conscience meetings and is a trusted mentor for new residents. Since its inception, there have been thirty residents who have adorned the Godfather Robe. Current BRC employees Mike Traner, Dale Ogle, Preston Shoppa, Mike Kerr, Shane Renshaw, Ty Labenne, Gavin Valdez, and Chris Burnham are all part of this prestigious lineage.
The Godfather tradition continues to this day… Alumni, post about your memories of the Godfather tradition at BRC.
 Just like pieces to a jigsaw puzzle, I take the lessons God presents in my life and connect them to create a cohesive picture. The pieces to my life puzzle this week:
-“Triumph of the inner spirit” While sharing his story at Benchmark Recovery Center, Mike D. expressed the importance of getting unblocked from the spirit that resides within our hearts and becoming okay with who we are at the core of our existence.
-“Perfect and Bulletproof” Brene Brown expresses in her book, Daring Greatly, the seductive features of being perfect and bulletproof. She suggests that we must be willing to walk into any arena—relationships, important meetings, difficult conversations, creative processes—with the penchant to grow rather than remain perfect and stoic.
-“Spiritual License” Pastor John Burke from Gateway discusses the necessity of spiritual accountability and what prevents us from allowing this process to occur.
-“The source of my tears” I had a particularly difficult meeting in which tears were shed. I was asked to take a look at the source of those tears.
How do these pieces connect? Vulnerability. As much as I have grown in my personal recovery, my ability to engage authentically in the world, I still find it extremely difficult to face myself and my imperfections…my freckles, my wrinkles, my insecurities, my failed marriage, my addiction.
Shedding the protective layers of the ego is no easy feat; it is a process that takes place over a lifetime. However, each time I set aside my pride and allow myself to be vulnerable, I open up to God’s power and abundance. With vulnerability, I am closer to being the woman God created—a woman who is capable of authenticity, love, courage, and connection.
“We are so accustomed to disguise ourselves to others that in the end we become disguised to ourselves.”– Francois de La Rocefoucau
About the Author:
Vickie Bing is the Director of Alumni Services for Benchmark Recovery Center. She received her B.A. in English from the University of Texas at Arlington. Vickie is a former high school teacher. She is also an Air Force Veteran. You can read other posts at benchmarkcenter.com/blog.
Benchmark Recovery Center is rounding up teams of two to participate in Austin’s Muddy Buddy run on May 11, 2013.
Get the dirty details on our Facebook page by clicking here. Please contact Vickie Bing at vbing@benchmarkcenter.com to RSVP.
Unlike the Boy Scouts who are always prepared, I arrived at my very first half marathon lacking some fundamental “Do’s” and “Don’ts.” After some practical experience with the process, however, I learned these basic guidelines to make future races a bit easier:
1. Weather—always check the weather forecast! I arrived ill-prepared for the climate change from Austin to Dallas: 84—hot and humid to 51—cold and cloudy.
2. Nutrition—stay away from fiber to avoid unexpected port-a-potty visits and go heavy on the carbs to sustain energy.
3. Transportation—not a great idea to drive 200 miles after you run 13.1 miles! I should have either planned to stay the night or had a chauffer drive me home, which is what I ended up doing.
4. Sleep—plenty of rest is required to pound the pavement at your peak.
5. Meditation—clear your mind to silence the chattering.
6. Ego—don’t run with your ego. A friend passed this tidbit along to me, and I must say it helped me fight the urge to “compete” with the runners who passed me.
7. Music—make sure your playlist is ready to go. My personal favorites to energize my run are Usher, Pink, Flo Rida, Chingy, and A$AP.
8. Training schedule—stay on track! Despite the advice of all my friends, runners and non-runners alike, I jumped ahead of my training schedule and ran all 13.1 miles two weeks early. The resulting leg injury made the eleventh mile of the actual race particularly difficult.
9. Course map—don’t look at the course map, it will freak you out! Enough said.
10. Cheering section—make sure to bring some friends along…you’ll need them for moral support during the race and physical support after the race.
11. Estimated finish time—don’t provide a fraudulent finish time based on your poor self-esteem. Personally I ended up in corral 14 based on the time I submitted. For those of you who don’t know, this section is where they stick all the walkers.
12. Survival Kit—you’ll need a handy survival kit: band-aids, Neosporin, Advil, Cliff bars, water, lots of water…
13. Bling—wear your “bling” only on race day. Apparently, continuing to wear your medal in normal day to day activities is considered bragging.
I respect my shortcomings that led to this list. After all, progress rather than perfection even applies to half marathons, and moving forward, I am properly armed for my next marathon.
About the Author:
Vickie Bing is the Director of Alumni Services for Benchmark Recovery Center. She received her B.A. in English from the University of Texas at Arlington. Vickie is a former high school teacher. She is also an Air Force Veteran. You can read other posts at benchmarkcenter.com/blog.
 On Saturday, March 9, current residents of Benchmark Recovery Center, Alumni, family and proud members of Austin’s Recovery Community gathered at the Mark Houston Hall to hear former Program Director Audrey C. tell her story. My house manager said to me once that you know a good story when you don’t look at the clock one time. I didn’t notice the clock or any wandering eyes last night, but I did take a few moments to look around in gratitude. And those in attendance were literally on the edge of their seats, as Benchmark Recovery Center went back to its roots.
As someone who never knew Mark Houston personally and came on property years after his passing, I was able to hear the message that this facility was founded on – the same message it honors today. Audrey’s voice echoed the voices of the Program Directors and mentors I came to know and love in the four months I spent on the hill. The teacher of my teachers, if you will.
A Solution to Transform Your Life
Comically, Audrey joked about the solution that came to her from this “big, giant book” everyone was talking about. Turns out it is a solution with the power to transform – from “a woman no one wanted to touch” to a powerful and confident person who has had and continues to have an experience with God. She revealed enough of the tragedy and heartache of her own experience with Alcoholism for those of us in the audience to understand we come from the same place. Declaring, “If you can find a better way, good for you.” There was a sense of shared peril and shared solution in a room clamoring with drug addicts and alcoholics who had tried for a better way and come up empty. But there is hope in a room that is filled by the purest light and laughter. Above all, Audrey fostered a sense of community, and there was a feeling we were all “amongst our tribe.”
Join us next month, on the 13th of April, as we welcome Mike D. of Los Angeles, CA. We hope to see you there!
About The Author:
Mary Huber is a grateful alumnus of Benchmark Recovery Center. She currently lives at the Benchmark women’s apartments and works full-time as a Customer Service Representative. Mary plans to continue her undergraduate studies in political science and journalism this fall.
Last week I was slipping into a “fml” frame of mind when a friendly text exchange changed my perspective:
Right! And the laughter continued the next morning as I stood before the Firestone salesperson and heard the words “cannot fix the tire…nail in the sidewall…structure compromised…will cost $218…”
I excused myself to pause, pray, and seek advice. As I sat in the lobby mulling over my predicament, I felt God’s grace. Past experience has taught me that “just to the extent that I do as I think He would have me, and humbly rely on Him, does He enable me to match calamity with serenity.” And this situation was no different. I had to ask myself, “Where is my reliance?”
After the initial sting dissipated, I went ahead and bought the tire, trusting God would provide for me. And, as usual, everything worked out.
About the Author:
Vickie Bing is the Director of Alumni Services for Benchmark Recovery Center. She received her B.A. in English from the University of Texas at Arlington. Vickie is a former high school teacher. She is also an Air Force Veteran. You can read other posts at benchmarkcenter.com/blog.
Charity activities are the force which gives our life meaning. -Mazhar El Shorbagi
Benchmark Recovery Center imparts the importance of taking an active interest in the lives of others to its residents. Primarily this lesson is working with another alcoholic/addict. However, it is also about giving back to the community we live in.
This Saturday, Benchmark residents will hands-on experience with giving back. They will take part in It’s My Park Day, organized by the Austin Parks Foundation, and will clean up one of Austin’s beloved parks, Brentwood Park, by picking up trash and clearing debris.
No longer do we live in isolation, ruled by our addition – we become productive members of society. And the benefits become tenfold, both within ourselves and the world at large.
About the Author:
Vickie Bing is the Director of Alumni Services for Benchmark Recovery Center. She received her B.A. in English from the University of Texas at Arlington. Vickie is a former high school teacher. She is also an Air Force Veteran. You can read other posts at benchmarkcenter.com/blog.
 I had a conversation recently with a dear friend about the importance of “not asking why” We agreed that this was one of the biggest lessons we learned from the Benchmark Recovery Center experience. I know that when I first arrived, it was hard for me to understand the logic behind the rules. I think I rolled my eyes the entire time my buddy went through the Code of Conduct. I could not understand what “zen-ing” my room and not bringing red cups downstairs had to do with me not shooting dope anymore. How was this supposed to keep me sober?
Over time, I learned to ask fewer questions. No one was going to tell me when we were going on our next outing or whether or not I was getting that elusive fifth month. I don’t know if I could really comprehend the underlying lesson of all of this while I was a resident. I just came to a point of surrender where I was willing to do anything I was told because I knew, from my experience, that I did not have any clue how to stay sober. So we move from defiance, to acceptance, to surrender… And, finally, we find FAITH.
It makes sense to me now, in retrospect – that my life is really none of my business anymore. And I don’t ask why because I trust that God has the answers, and I don’t need to know everything after all. Hasn’t self-knowledge availed me nothing? My struggle and attempt to know and understand this world and to have it look the way I want is exactly what got me to Benchmark Recovery Center in the first place. Who knew that staying in silence on the van-ride to an outside meeting was really all about making a Third-Step Decision? When I agree to turn my will and my life over to the care of God, I forfeit my right to ask why and to interject my opinion about results.
About The Author:
Mary Huber is a grateful alumnus of Benchmark Recovery Center. She currently lives at the Benchmark women’s apartments and works full-time as a Customer Service Representative. Mary plans to continue her undergraduate studies in political science and journalism this fall.
|
MHR & BRC Alumni Are you a former resident of MHR or BRC?
Sign Up for the Newsletter!
|
